The Big G.O.
Great Oden’s Raven Hangin
So here we are, 1 day removed from the breaking news that self portraits of Greg Oden naked had hit the web. Greg, Greg, Greg, Greg, Greg… Oh how I could take the time to sit here bashing you about the irresponsibility you have shown by this. Instead, I will go the other way and back you.
You are young. It happens. Women can be very convincing and get you to do things that you otherwise would never do. At 21, I might have done the same thing if the girl played me well enough. Luckily I somehow tipped toed around such girls and am too wise for that game now.
If basketball ever falls through you might have a career behind a camera. Artistic composition of the pieces are quite fine. Decent lighting for a camera phone. Great job framing the picture too. I don’t think people understand how hard it is to fit a 7’1” body into a tiny camera phone frame. It also looks like you took the time to do some push-ups and sit-ups to get the muscles looking pumped up. And we all know how hard it is to take a clear picture with a camera phone. And we saw everything pretty damn clear.
I can also tell you can play the game right back at the ladies. You sly dog… Sending pictures of you progressively getting into your birthday suit… Genius! Make ‘em always want more!
You are Greg F-in Oden. You don’t need to explain yourself to anybody. Sure, parents aren’t gonna let little Johnny wear his number 52 jersey to school for a couple of weeks. But, society is forgiving and Blazer fans love their team way too much to let this bother them. Win a playoff series and all will be forgotten. Dude, you didn’t even make SportsCenter because of this… Its fine. Plus, it seems like the spotlight has changed you as a person anyway. This might be the best thing to happen to you. You have been knocked off this moral pedestal and now you might be able to be yourself again.
Your pictures have also put the axe to a blog post about the Blazers playing “Rock you Like a Hurricane” during a timeout of Monday’s game. Sure, they play that song every game. But every game isn’t against the New Orleans Hornets (Katrina anyone?). The Nolia boys responded by holding Portland scoreless the rest of the way. So way to take one for the team.
And finally, you handled this like a true pro and absolutely the right way. You came out and attacked it and took responsibility for it. THE SAME DAY. You didn’t just wait for it to blow over. You didn’t try and deny it. You didn’t stir up more to it by waiting a couple days to address it. And when you did address it, it wasn’t some statement with you limping off without answering questions. You sat there fielded the questions and did it all the right way. You owned it and I commend you for that.
Now go hide for a couple months and come back to the hardwood ready to play. And don’t forget your clothes.